Tell me if this sounds familiar:
One day you come across a blog. Next thing you know hours have passed; you’ve become engrossed in it’s entries. Perhaps it’s the witty writing, the beautiful photos, or a combination of several things. Whatever the case may be, the blog speaks to you and you begin following it. It’s now part of your daily internet ‘life’, and you jump for joy whenever there’s a new entry. You feel awkward knowing the name of the bloggers pets, what their favorite cocktail is and where they went for their last vacation. But hey, that’s the modern world for ya.
The longer you follow the blog the more you discover how much in common you have with the blogger. You both love vintage clothing. You adore the same designers. You’ve road tripped to the same places and perhaps even listened to some of the same songs along the way. You’re excited to see the same film. How cool!
You get cyber social, praising their latest outfit and slick photography skills. You thank them for the heads up on that cool restaurant, and wish them luck with their new website. You gush about how much you love that band too. You’d think they’d appreciate your kind words, and be happy to hear from someone with similar passions in life. Right?
Wrong! Rather than accept your sincere compliments, they delete them! And you can’t help but feel a bit hurt, confused as to why this was done.
Has anyone else out there experienced this?
This has happened to me a a few times. In all cases the censoring blogger has been of the high profile variety; getting plenty of hits per day, constantly written up by other bloggers, courted for endorsements by designer labels. etc. Meanwhile I’ve kept a much lower profile. What possible harm could I be doing?
I’ve NEVER spammed a blog or personal profile in my life, and I don’t post anonymous nasty comments. I don’t post nasty comments to people at all. I only leave comments when I have something nice to say, and always leave my name and contact information when doing so. In other words, if I’m commenting on a blog, it’s because I genuinely like the content. I thought bloggers appreciated positive feedback. Isn’t that half the fun?
So why the snub?
Last week this happened to me again. I realized a certain high profile blogger has deleted not one, but around 10 comments I’ve posted to her over the past several months! I had to give it some thought, wondering what I possibly could’ve said to upset her. Was a compliment taken the wrong way? Did she somehow mistake me for a Nigerian scammer? What about my 10 compliments was so offensive? I even emailed her hoping to get to the bottom line of this, but got no response. Meanwhile I couldn’t help but notice she allowed comments along the lines of “nice post! http://enterblogurlofyourchoicehere” and other such half baked comments from other bloggers.
At first I didn’t get it. But then it dawned on me: The spammy comments were coming from younger bloggers who are still discovering their style and interests. I on the other hand have been cultivating the interests I blog about for the past 17 years. I’m capable of going to to toe with said blogger. The only possible reason for her actions is insecurity. Plain and simple.
Perhaps you’re now thinking “Sarah Jayne, please. Photographers travel halfway across the country to feature her in national publications, and she has way more money than you! Why would you make her insecure?”
And I wish that I didn’t, but let’s face it: all the wealth and internet fame in the world doesn’t make one a better person. Perhaps this blogger (and those like her) think it does though.
They place themselves on pedestals, marketing themselves as being so unique and quirky, and thrive on compliments from those who believe it to be so. But in reality there’s plenty of others just like them. So when one such person reaches out and makes their presence known, it’s perceived as a threat, an intrusion on their little world. They can’t hang with the fact they aren’t as unique as they want others to believe, and don’t want their ‘fans’ to find that out.
Well fuck that! I’m not into supporting phonies like that, so perhaps they’ve done me a favor by showing their true colors. And furthermore, I’m flattered they find me threatening.
So to the bloggers it may concern (I hate to break it to ya, but),
YOU DO NOT HAVE A MONOPOLY ON AWESOME. Get over yourselves and get some real self esteem, rather than just rely on impressionable young girls to fluff your egos. Eventually the ‘fan girls’ will grow up and move on. Then what? You can’t play god forever.